Traveling in the time of Covid- Summer 2020

I have just arrived in Michigan and am taking an enormous, deep, breathy sigh. I have finally made it to our family summer cottage on the lake after three weeks of extensive zig-zagging cross-country travel. As luck would have it, I arrived on the eve of our eldest child’s 28th birthday, for which I am so grateful. I was delighted to be able to participate in the celebration of our family big brother!

I arrived just in time to see my crew playing lawn Yatzee!

I have found traveling during Covid both extremely stressful (real legitimate and frightening virus concerns) and extremely poignant (deeply important time with adult children). I walked away from this experience thinking every parent and their twenty-something child should do such a drive and spend so much time together talking and talking while on the road. However, I stumbled into this adventure and came to this conclusion after this unique situation presented itself with children number 6 and 7. I highly suspect children 1-5 are hugely relieved they escaped such torture!

This crazy zig-zagging extravaganza was completely unplanned. Each step was an unexpected chapter in the unfolding story of this crazy summer of Covid 2020. It began out of necessity. Our youngest daughter Birdie had transferred into CU Boulder last January after a life changing semester with NOLS in Tanzania - which included hiking across the beautiful African nation, sleeping under the stars (while at times avoiding lions!), living with a homestay family, climbing Kilimanjaro with neither a sherpa nor a guide, and a celebratory trip to Zanzibar with her now forever NOLS pals. Transferring into a winter community in January, living in an isolated dorm, and being sent home again in March due to COVID does not make for solid roots in a new University. It was absolutely not as fun and exciting as her dreamy and magical fall semester. She has been stuck with her parents since March, and like most college kids, she is excited to return to campus. Three weeks ago my youngest and I decided she needed a “do over” and we flew to Boulder to visit the now sunny, warm campus and find housing. Luck would be on our side for not only did she find wonderful housing in a great location, she magically stumbled upon fabulous housemates as well!

After flying earlier in the summer on a nearly empty Delta flight through the extremely empty Albany Airport and a deserted Detroit airport I was optimistic for a similar experience. I was very wrong. While Albany airport remains very vacant, our Southwest flight to Dever was not. Every row had 2 people per side and the stumbling around finding seats - which I usually love, felt exposing. The Denver airport was packed and unnerving. It was not the experience I hoped for or expected.

Upon our return to Vermont we packed up my car and my baby and I headed to Colorado. Two chatty gals in a vehicle for our college student and with a line up of both riveting and timely Audible books, we hit the road. My very accomplished driver gave mom many breaks and I had the time to get in some great needlepointing while listening to and discussing both best selling Untammed by Glennon Doyle and Caste by Isabel Wilkerson (Oprah’s latest riveting book club choice). We travelled state to state discussing many pertinent and timely topics including feminism, life choices, and our heartbreaking and unacceptable race problems in this country. We arrived new women, for sure! The needlepoint project I am working on is a beautiful and modern blue and white geometric design from Lycette in Palm Beach. There are 9 unique blue columns running through the canvas. The drive from Vermont to Colorado includes 9 states, a fortuitous coincidence creating a treasured heirloom to mark this particular time in our family and global history.

My wonderful canvas from Lycette. Pepperpot fibers and small scissors are kept in this fab India Amory bag for easy travel.

During this long drive Birdie and I needed breaks. Huge fans of Drew Barrymore, we searched aisles of Walmarts in Ohio and Iowa for products Drew was recommending and demonstrating on her Instagram account in celebration of Beauty Week. Drew has been a fabulous breath of fresh air for us during the pandemic with great blog posts, interesting IGTV videos, and fun little video posts. Her unsolicited demonstrations of her favorite face wash and Crest whitening toothpaste are darling, hilarious, and so humble. I laughed when she said Crest might want her to stop talking about their products! As if! These videos piqued our curiosity and started us on a hilarious beauty product hunt during our breaks from hours and hours of driving. We added a search for our favorite lip glosses to our road trip entertainment. I discovered two I am particularly fond of, they are Lancôme’s Juicy Tube in Magic Spell (found at Ulta) and Drew’s Flower -Petal Pout in Sangria (found at King Soopers in Fort Collins, Co.)

The hunt for the best lip gloss entertained us during driving breaks. My two favorites are from Lancomê and Flower!

The second drive to Colorado was also completely unplanned. While in the midst of Colorado Drive 1.0, I decided to tackle Colorado Drive 2.0.. Youngest son Scotty decided wisely to join his siblings and move to Colorado. His crazy mother hatched a plan to make this happen. My father used to call me Patton when I was a young mother moving 5 small children back and forth between Houston where we lived, and his home in Bronxville. My dearest Daddy had driven an ambulance in WWII under Patton and he meant this knickname as the highest and funniest compliment. He would say to me “You can move an an army like nobody’s business.” Ha! Well this time, I did it on steroids. I wish he was here to see it and laugh with me. This was not the act of a high achieving dedicated mother! Hell no! This was the act of a desperate frazzled gray-haired gal during a global fucking pandemic! ! I was a woman on a mission. On a mission to GO ON VACATION!! My wonderfully darling and romantic husband and I had planned a vacation to his family cottage on Lake Michigan. I wanted to sit on the deck overlooking this gorgeous Great Lake, needlepoint, drink wine and eat white fish dip from Leland for God’s sake. I was on a time table to get these kids out of my hair! (And they were determined to get away from me!! Their tolerance for quarantining with the grey haired boring parents had long expired.) I say this in jest, but damn it, the two trips were really magical! At least for me!

And thus began “Tricia’s moving company, the one that is running on pure crazy” chapter of The Summer of 2020. I flew home on another crowded plane through a crowded airport (YUCK!). Rented a minivan, drove to Vermont, did one load of laundry and repacked my suitcase, fell fast asleep, and got up the next morning to a packed minivan and hit the road again for my second drive to Colorado in 7 days. I had our barely 23 year old son, his 22 year old fiancé and their gorgeous Dr Suess-like pup Otis. While my first drive included a cooler and an expert sandwich maker by my side, this trip was fueled on gas station food, particularly candy and Diet Coke. While I will be detoxing for months from the chemicals and sugar I ingested, my heart will be full forever from the three days I had my son in the co-pilot seat. There were no books on tape or music on this trip. This will forever be known as “Mother and son do not shut up for one fricking second for three days.” (As I type this I think of my older children reading this thinking “Holy Hell!! Thank God I was not trapped in a car with mom for three days!”) Scotty’s fiancé Miranda somehow survived this blabber mouthing and at one point played a couple true crime podcasts for us.

Otis the beautiful Dr Suess like rescue waits patiently in the front seat for his parents’ to return at the rest stop.

Two child school enrollments were completed, housing was both secured and outfitted, and a few fabulous dinners were had with my gang. This whole experience filled my heart. Target has all my money. My two youngest children live half a mile apart. Two wonderful brothers are in close proximity and mama got out of dodge. It was all so damn good!

My final departure from Denver airport was complete. My wonderful spaced out seat on United was a pleasure and I made it safely to Traverse City. It is here, in a cottage built by my mother and father-in-law in the early 60s that I begin my quarantine for the umpteenth time. The turquoise waves are rolling rapidly and loudly towards the beach. The wind is blowing and I sigh. 12 days more days of quarantining until I feel like this trip was truly a success.

I’d like to share with you some non-factual and purely opinionated travel tips I have.

1. Some airports are deserted and feel super safe. Some airports are crowded as hell and you have to ride jammed in windowless trains to your gate. Some security lines are empty and some are like Studio 54 and have you winding through paths of people with everyone well within 6 feet of you on every side.

2. Some travelers are very cautious and avoid you like the plague, literally. Some do not believe in science and boundaries or covering their mouths when they cough. It’s like Lord of the Flies meets Darwinism. You try to keep yourself safe amongst people who don’t believe there is a virus. (insert eye roll.)

3. Some states have mask requirements. In some states you will not see a mask at all. (We found the later to be shocking and unnerving.) It’s worth doing research on state mandates if you care about this stuff before you travel.

4. Most restaurants in highway rest stops are closed. A cooler full of great bread and cold cuts is a dream during road travel. A creative sandwich maker like my girl Birdie will make you realize sandwiches with Thousand Island dressing and pickles really are THAT good!

5. We found the roadways to be rather quiet, hotels to be at minimum capacity, and precautions like no daily housekeeping comforting. With the exception of one state, all hotel workers were in masks, behind screens, wearing gloves, and really welcoming to weary travelers. A special shoutout to the Hotel Boulderado which made me feel particularly safe on all three trips to Boulder!

6. Outdoor dining is great. Outdoor dining where mask-less people walk by close to the table on the sidewalks, not so great. Try to choose tables that don’t border the walkways.

7. Many of the shops and restaurants in some airports are closed. Airlines are not serving their normal fare. Bring snacks and other comforts and entertainment with you.

8. Over all, I am personally more comfortable with road over air travel at the moment. I have been in 3 empty airports. I have also been in a very busy airport 3 times.

9. If you find yourself needing a rental car bring a variety of chargers and a phone holder that pops into the fan vents. I have found myself numerous times without CarPlay in rental cars, only cigarette lighter charger outlet, and phones with maps falling on the floor while trying to drive. I found what I needed in gas stations along the way and it made my driving long distances so much more simple.

Best wishes to your own families as you navigate the new normal!

Looking forward to a few days doing this, and doing it right here next to this beautiful lake..

Waking Up In Michigan

Snoozing away to the sound of waves crashing outside our window, with doggies safely in the hands of their favorite pet sitter in Vermont, I have been back to my old ways of fabulous deep morning sleep ins. While Don jumps out of bed for sunrise swims in his childhood lake, I cuddle up with my baby pillow I have brought here with me in my carry-on luggage. My dreams have been rather dramatic during this time of Covid. I often wake with a start, with my heart racing, talking myself down from some crazy nocturnal adventure or unrest. The Wall of Moms being tear gassed, insane tweets from the Oval Office, and a deadly disease out of control in the U.S. that keeps me from crossing borders to countries where my children live is survivable in daylight hours. In the night, it all plays on my soul.

This morning I was the first one up. Wide awake at 5:30 a.m.. This time it was I who jumped from the bed. I moved to the living room overlooking the lake. With my hot cup of tea, the view of dreams, and my old friend Kevin Kwan I have begun my day. Several years ago I arrived at this Wes Andersonesque family cottage by the sea as I always do, with a few clothes, lots of books, and more needlepoint than I can possible finish.

I had with me a brand new book I had read about in a magazine; with a gorgeous cover and a shocking title, Crazy Rich Asians caught everyone’s eye. Nose deep in this beautiful book, birthing my obsession with Singapore and Mah Jong, I tuned out all family activities and delighted in this amazing tale. With my highest compliments I passed this book around the family. Long after we left I received texts from others who read the book and shared my joy. Each year I brought back the next installment to awaiting fans. My eldest daughter walked in the house one day to find Rich People Problems sitting on the kitchen counter and was appalled to say the least. Even when I explained that the book was fiction, she still could not shake the title. I finally managed to get her to read the series, and although she loved them dearly, I suspect she probably covered the third in the trilogy in brown paper!

The family cottage is quiet this year. 2020 has even managed to affect this remote spot with the magical view. Family members usually gather together and fill every bed in every nook and cranny. Large gatherings at 5:00 for cocktails and “fish butter” (named by little great niece Willow) are now rather small and tame. Bustling dinners and late night poker games are dearly missed this year. We have arrived as Heaton: Party of 5. And we so miss the other Heatons who will stagger their time here or stay at home this year due to the virus.

Some things are the same. The beautiful view of sea and sky which dazzles us with dancing shades of blue, green, pink, purple, and orange. Old needlepoint pillows stitched by my beloved mother-in-law Mame, gorgeous pottery, including topless mermaids created by my ceramicist father-in-law, and Kevin Kwan’s latest juicy summer read. While 2020 brought the cancelation of a Greek and Italian travel adventure for my husband and I, Sex and Vanity has taken me to the Amalfi Coast for a tour of the most beautiful estates, gardens, and hotels. I have gained a new cast of characters in my list of favorite friends. They have stolen my heart. I am here, early this morning, devoted again to the adventures of wedding guests as they celebrate in glorious Capri. Thank you Keven Kwan for bringing some much appreciated summer joy this very unusual year.

Quarantine Journal- Part 2: Things I Have Re Fallen in Love With

10 simple pleasures I have fallen in love with during the time in self quarantine.

1. Taking time for tea. As someone who has never had a cup of coffee in my life, I am particularly in love with tea. I have different favorites, but I always prefer a black tea without flowery or perfumey flavors. My usuals are Irish Breakfast, PG tips, Darjeeling, Orange Pekoe, and Prince of Wales. My current favorite tea in stock is Taylors of Harrogate: English Breakfast. I have in quarantine taken the time to use lovely sugar bowls and creamers to hold half and half or heavy cream.

2. Lots of lovely old clean dishtowels. My wonderful stepmother always collected tea towels when we would travel. I remember her enthusiasm when we were on trips when I was a child to Bermuda, Ireland, and England. She was thrilled purchasing fun printed dish towels with designs that reflected the destinations. I have continued this tradition. Let’s face it, I never met a dish towel I didn’t like and have a vast collection of colorful, fun, and soft worn treasures. We have stopped using paper towels and every morning I thoroughly enjoy throwing yesterday’s towels in the laundry and selecting new ones for the day. I also love lovely country style knit dish rags for the sink. They are a little dingy in color but they are soft and smell fabulous when I put them out each morning.

3. Giving the dogs a treat. This has always been my favorite part of the day and one I overzealously have used to create nudgey pups who know they have a softy at their disposal. With time moving at a slower pace, I find myself spending more and more time in the pantry talking to the dogs as I give them treats. Daisy is particularly interested in pantry conversations. Finn really just wants me to get to the point. The treat.

4. Bleaching the sink. We have a big 3 bay white porcelain farmer’s sink. It is almost the width of our double window overlooking the waterfall out back. I have recently purchased some fantastic Bleach Alternative from The Laundress and my favorite household job has become bleaching the beautiful old sink.

5. Clean sheets and the smell of clean pillow cases. As a child I attending Camp Avalon, a girls’ sailing camp in Chatham, Massachusetts. Our chore every Sunday was to change our sheets and send the dirty ones off to the local laundry service. (Lucky girls!!) To this day I love changing my sheets. I love getting into clean sheets on that first night, and I particularly love the feeling and smell of clean pillow cases. I am a pillow girl. Clean pillows are the best.

6. Books. I am a book collector. I have my grandmother’s history books, my father’s childhood classics (including a first edition Winnie the Pooh) and a vast collection of cookbooks. As a single mother I worked numerous jobs at a time to keep my children and I afloat. One of my favorite jobs was working at our local independent bookstore. I made myself a little promise that with each paycheck I would purchase one art book. Reality took over wishes, but over the course of 7 years I did acquire an amazing art book collection. There are decades of novels collected over the years, and over the past 20 years I have collected shelves and shelves of interior designs and architecture books. My husband joined our marriage with his own large collection of books. A Buddhist and meditation guru, Don has collected rows and rows of spiritual books. Also known as Doctor Doolittle and Indiana Jones in our house, my outdoors enthusiast has a vast collection of bird and animal field guides. Golf and garden books are a regular gift for my guy. Together we have added a vast collection of travel guides and travel lit gems. When we bought Starlight Farm it came with a fabulous little library surrounded on two sides with floor to ceiling sturdy built-in bookcases. We have filled every inch of shelf space. Don and Courteney and I are loving rereading and exploring our own library.

7. Morning Fires. Starlight Farm has two fireplaces. Our living room has a tall brick architecturally unique and interesting structure. Our kitchen has a fireplace which I think looks Southwestern with its white stucco exterior and rustic wood mantle. In the winters when the house is full of revelers we have the fireplace going at all times. Our soon to be son-in-law and my great girlfriends Amy and Kari are the house fireplace stokers when they are in our nest. In the car heading from Florida to Vermont I began my mental “checklist of Hugge”. What were we going to need to feel really at home for weeks on end? Needless to say we called our favorite wood source and had a half quart of cord dry wood delivered in our driveway for our arrival. Morning fires are a luxury in chilly April, one I treasure greatly. Something so simple brings me such joy.

8. Everything old. I am a magpie. (Insert my entire family rolling their eyes.) I collect oddities. As the youngest children in both of our families both Don and I each entered our marriage with a collection of beautiful family hand-me-downs and treasures. This includes Don’s gorgeous thin narrow red hutch which has become the family trophy cases and houses all of our children’s beloved childhood clay projects. In our dining room sits my family’s dining room sideboard from Bronxville, an English Antique my mother bought with her friend and interior designer Jane Mitchell in the early 1970s. Other family treasures include lamps, side tables, gorgeous desks, piles of dishes, candlesticks, andirons, fireplace screens and tools, and a great deal of art. I have added to these treasures over the years with things like a wall size Union Jack, antique toy horses, a child’s saddle, a life size carved Indian head, and a very large wooden bear. Tag sales and consignment shops have been my source for midcentury dining room chairs, mixed matched 3 Bears style kitchen chairs, the most comfortable Swedish living room chairs on the planet, and old games to hang on the walls. I really like the quality of old pieces, I love the pantina and the uniqueness of the items. And the prices can be fantastic! For me the hunt for these items is a big part of the pleasure. I have had great joy over the past few weeks cleaning old wooden tables, fluffing cushions, rearranging basically everything in my house, remembering loved ones that acquired them, and reimagining how to you use old pieces in new places. Last week Courteney painted our powder room and Don and I moved his grandparents’ gorgeous ornate antique gold mirror into this simple space. My favorite piece in our house now adorns the smallest space.

9. Cooking. I can cook. I’ve always been able to cook and do it well. I haven’t always chosen to do it. I have over the years gone from making delicacies to mess hall cook for a family of 9. Our eldest son Jasper is an incredible cook and when he’s in the house I happily step aside or work as his sous chef. The past few years Don and I have really gotten into eating out and can often be found at the Pink Elephant on our favorite tiny island. Over the past few weeks acquiring groceries has been a bit of a challenge, and I have reclaimed my title as head chef. I do not like going on the grocery store and exposing myself to the other shoppers. I have come up with some routines to bring regular and varied groceries into our home. We have joined a CSA, arranged for occasional curbside pickup at our small independent health food stores and at times visited our small independent country stores for items like butter. Last week we added our first ever meal delivery boxes and are currently testing and comparing Martha Stewart’s Marley’s Spoon and Hello Fresh. Although this seems like a lot when I write it, it’s not. When you are navigating 3 meals a day for 3 people, it’s just about perfect. My cooking journey is joyful, nutritious, and another creative outlet. I was absolutely delighted when our youngest son called and asked for some of my recipes. I’m thinking of creating a cookbook for our children.

10. Inner Clock. I was a big night owl as a child. My parents would put me to bed and I would play, talk to myself, and entertain myself for hours upon hours in my nursery off their master bedroom. When baby sitting me, my teenage older sister used to go to bed long for before her charge. Boarding school and college were a night owl’s dream. Motherhood of school age children and being a teacher was a huge sleep struggle. Nothing like an early morning school routine to buzz stomp a night owl life. I find myself thriving in the world without days of the week and clocks. I literally have to make myself go to bed between 2 and 4 am. Our friends in Barcelona would be so thrilled to see my ditch my American schedule. I have graduated to someone who can eat very late dinners and thrive.

What simple joys have you refound during this time? Please feel free to include them in the comment section.

Kitchen cleaning has become more fun with sink bleaching.

My favorite art in my house!

I’ve raised the bar in cleaning and laundry with products from The Laundress.

Browning Couscous

First CSA box arrives to an enthusiastic household.

Working on a daily vegetable sauté to use during the day to enhance our menu and nutrition.

My poached egg pan is one of my all time favorites. You fill the bottom with water and each egg has it’s own little cup.

Starlight Farm breakfast special.

Don participates in the Heaton family pop tart making party on zoom.

Some of the wood delivery is stacked at the left. The burch logs were found on the side of the road two years ago and are getting used as well.

Kitchen fire set at 7:30 this morning.

It takes a village of Vermonters to make the perfect pillow

Jumping for joy at seeing daughter Brooke's elephant pillow in the January issue of Better Homes and Gardens!! Thank you to Sarah Hadden (highlighted in another blog post) for stitching this gem and to Maria Timmerman at In Stitches in Dorset, Vermont for everything. She finished this pillow in dreamy purple velvet! In Stitches is one of my all time favorite needlepoint shops. Maria knows color better than anyone I know. She does all of my personal finishing.  I'm so proud of Brooke!!